I hope you get the meaning of that get a new watch thing because I’m not about to explain it, but trust me I now think it is time for me to get a new one myself. Several years ago I met this amazing babe who worked a civil service job similiar to the one I was working at the time.  Nsane was in the beginning stages and we had a site up but it was not as fine tuned as the current one (www.nsanephotography.com), so when I wasn’t working with that I was busy with my studies at Ohio State since I was about to graduate from there.  This young lady captured my attention from the moment I saw her sexy ass walk into the room.  She was absolutely gorgeous and even other women checked her out when she walked by, and although I had yet to speak to her, I knew she was involved with someone, but I also knew that somehow she and I would be an item one day.  I associated this mission with the statement President Kennedy made back in 1962 about the country undertaking the task of putting a man on the moon and returning him safely home by the end of the decade.  That was to be the most ambitious technological effort ever made by any country in the history of man.  Well me getting next to this girl who was clearly out of my league was going to be just about as hard as getting a man on the moon.  As a matter of fact my mission was probably more difficult, all they had to deal with was science, I had to deal with the female personality and we all know that is completely unpredictable!

To make a long story short, several years (yes years!) went by and I ended up with that amazing babe next to me romantically.  Of course the first year was great, couldn’t get enough of each other!  Every spare moment of my time was with her, I had quit traveling with the fellas, cut out photo shoots, got rid of all the sexual standby’s I had, I pretty much became a good boyfriend and I was cool with that because I thought this was going to be the one I got old with.  I admit the first thing I wanted to do was “hit it” when I first saw her but once I did that I thought to myself I could get used to her being next to me.  I really enjoyed the attention I got from other couples who would see us together because I knew the women thought; “How in the hell did he get next to her” and I know the men thought; ” Damn my man hit the lottery with that one”!  I didn’t care what any0ne thought to be honest, I was just glad to be with a babe that everyone wanted.  Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had my share of cuties over the years but this one was “Leave your wife and kids material”.

A friend of mine likes to repeat this quote from a movie we saw; “Show me a pretty girl and I will show you someone who is tired of fucking her”.  Now I am not saying that is what happened to me, after several years together I still enjoyed sex with the Amazing Babe but lets just say I wasn’t running over to her house like I used to.  This wasn’t because the sex was getting old, it was because she changed about 165 degrees from when I met her.  In the beginning she was the cool girlfriend, now she was nagging me like a wife of seven years.  I admit I’m not always a day at the beach but she knew all about me and my little ways before we were committed to each other.  Nsane was taking off and I was back to the photo shoots and international trips.  I tried to compromise but no matter what I did it was never good enough.  We fought, we argued, and once she started making big bucks at a new job she figured out that she didn’t need me anymore like she used to.  Before when she was broke I had no problem helping her out financially because she was my partner in life, now that she made her own money, there went the partnership.  Of course she saw differently but I told her the day she got her high paying gig (largely because I helped her with the process she needed to complete to qualify for it) that it was going to be the end of us.  No longer was sitting at home watching rented videos and eating take out acceptable (yeah we did occassionally but not often like we had), yes I was making more jack also so I didn’t have a problem with doing things like taking trips to Central America for our anniversary or going to the Virgin Islands for her birthday, but the simple things were a thing of the past.  Our relationship had changed for the worse so now when we fought her first thought was to exit the commitment, so we broke up several times after silly fights, most of which I can’t even remember.  I do remember once going to her place after returning from a trip to Argentina to give her some presents I bought for her, she gave me a note telling me why she was breaking up with me, talk about a blindside! I took her back after she changed her mind the next day.  That was the norm, break up, then get back together, started to happen so much I didn’t get get bothered by it.  Once when she broke up with me I flew down to Puerto Rico the next day to join a friend who was down there.  I get a call as we were about to go to some club in San Juan called Club San Tropez, it was the Amazing Babe crying and begging me to take her back.  I did after I returned back from P.R., had to enjoy a day or two of freedom!

One break up lasted a year and a half but when we met up for lunch one day we forgot all about what had been troubling us and ended up in my bed later that evening, needless to say we were back together.  Six months later we weren’t talking, a few months after that we were again.  The break ups were coming closer together now, not sure about her but my temperment was a lot shorter these days, I just didn’t want to deal with any of the bullshit I used to deal with from her.  No matter what I did, it wasn’t good enough.  I had cut the trips out completely and shot only a few times with select Models, still not good.  She wanted me to quit Nsane completely, that was not going to happen.  I asked her what would happen if I did and she still broke up with me?  Internet sites especially those that make money don’t have an on and off switch.  I knew it would only be a matter of time when she would find some other reason to give me the boot. 

The end came for me when I had a run in with the law that landed me in the Pokey for almost two weeks.  OK I got over the fact she never made an effort to come visit me, but when I got out I still didn’t see her there with open arms.  I walk out of jail and see every low life who had in there with me getting greeted like they were returning from war and I didn’t even have a ride home! Weeks later when I had my day in court I couldn’t get a hold of her to tell her the outcome and when I did she got upset at me because I didn’t get excited over her passing a test at work.  I knew it was over then, I don’t ask for much but you could at least be there for me when I need you to be, I had always been there for her like she needed her car fixed or wanted a pair of Manolo Blahniks or Jimmy Choos.  I have to be honest, she did pay me back $1700.00 for the shoes but you get what I am trying to say here.  I do admit I did fuck up once and skipped a funeral for a shoot in Vegas and auto show.  I never stopped hearing about that one and trust me not only did that lead to a break up, she still is upset over it years later!  I kept going back to her mainly because I was comfortable with her.  I didn’t feel like starting over with the dating scene and if you say you love someone, you try to make it work.  She once told me after we got back together that she couldn’t leave me behind.  Maybe that was because I always gave her nice gifts even after we had broken up, that was my bad, found out you can’t buy love, The Beatles were right!  This last break up was the most juvenile, she just quit talking to me, for months!  Now the very least you can do is to tell someone to go “fuck off” when you want to leave them, don’t just disappear like you were abducted by aliens, but like I said, the female personality is unpredictable!  I had to contact her by email to see what the deal was with us.  I even sent her a couple nice presents as a peace offering, she kept them but told me it was over with us.  I guess I will box up her stuff that she left behind and send it to her, may even include a watch that she had bought me since it is clearly time for me to get another one…

Most of the time when I’m in Central or South America getting next to hot women isn’t a problem.  After a nice meal or some time at a bar they are usually looking to hook up with some fun natured Foreigner such as myself.  Sometimes they may ask for some money to help their family situation, sometimes they don’t, either way I am ok with it.  Prostituion is legal in many parts of the world and not looked upon as a bad thing.  If a woman needs some extra cash to pay the bills she can always spruce herself up and go out and make the aquaintance of some guy looking for a good time, they come to an agreement and everyone is happy.  I do not see this as a crime if both are consenting adults.  Many women in those Latin Amerian countries will hold down other jobs such as Office Workers or even be employed in such professional positions as Dentists or Psychologist’s, but in todays economy they may come up short at the end of the month and have to resort to Plan B, selling their ass! 

A friend of mine always said you end up paying for it one way or the other.  What he meant by that was by time you get a girl in bed, you have already taken her out on several dates to movies, dinners, etc.  Chances are you bought her a gift for Valentine’s Day or her birthday, and of course when the holidays roll around you have to really impress her with something nice.  So you may have not paid anything upfront, but if you add all of those expenses up and look at the bottom line you will see you could’ve financed your company’s Operation Feed campaign.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m into long lasting and meaningful relationships too, but sometimes you’re not in the mood or position for all of that and you’re looking for more of a short term rental if you catch my drift.

I’ve always wondered, if you can give it away for free then why is it a problem with selling it? Is it the moral question or just because Uncle Sam can’t get a piece of the action?  If it is the latter then we should adopt the same policy that has been in play in Holland for years.  Not only is prostitution legal there it is a mainstay in the local and national economy.  The girls are required to have health inspections and they work in a clean save environment and have union like protection with their wages.  So much money is made from the sex industry there that the entire country has free health care and no one pays any federal taxes.  Face it, we are never going to get rid of prostitution so we may as well regulate it and make some cash from it so law enforcement can concentrate on other things such as that house getting invaded or some old lady getting robbed and beaten senseless after she cashes her dwindling social security check.

I’m not saying everyone should just go out looking for Crackheads so they can get a blowjob for 10 bucks.  If that is your thing then good luck with that.  I prefer to get with women who look and smell nice, have a decent head on their shoulders, and if they can’t speak English I do not hold that against them, sometimes that is half of the fun.  I’ve been in a good number of bars or clubs while in other countries and have had the best time communicating with women who can barely speak my language.  My Espanol is not the best but I know enough to get by.  Some times those girls have more interesting things to say than those who do speak my language, and also take better pride in their appearance!  When I say they look good trust me I’m telling you the God’s honest truth.  They are looking like what a woman is supposed to and you can’t help but be attracted to them.  Their motivation to look nice may be for capitalistic interests but who cares, nothing like seeing a sexy woman looking good as she gets comfortable beside you and her scent starts doing wonders to your nasal cavity.

All I’m saying is just because you aren’t into something, don’t go hating on someone who does what they want, when they want, with who they want, for how much they want.  If it doesn’t affect your income tax statement or impose on your personal space then live your life and let others live theirs.

Jack Armstrong can be found working at www.nsanephotography.com

Jack Armstrong can be found working at www.nsanephotography.com

My name is Jack Armstrong and I am the Senior Travel Correspondent for Nsane Productions, an internet based multi media company that specializes in portfolio development for Models in the fashion industry and website content photography. My job is to write about some of the many travels we make here at Nsane, especially those in Central and South America. With that in mind it is safe to say that I get laid with more women in more countries in one year than most Geeks get in ten. I have also had plenty of sexual encounters in Asia, Europe, Mexico, Canada, Puerto Rico and of course the good ole U.S. of A. I’m not trying to brag or sound like “The Pick Up Artist”, I’m a Geek myself, I’m not a Pretty Boy, hell I’m not even in shape anymore, but I do know how to talk to the babes and I have nothing against prostitution, so with those odds in my favor I will get laid one way or the other.

Within the last year my travels have taken me to Quito Ecuador three times, Panama City Panama four times, Rio de Janeiro Brazil twice, Lima Peru once, and of course one of my personal favorites, Las Vegas Nevada a couple of times. When you make this many trips and get with at least two or four babes per stop, your belt notch count can multiply like the federal deficit in no time at all. Like I said before, I am not bragging, this is just the way it is.

I wasn’t always getting this kind of action, I did have a steady girlfriend a year ago but since we broke up I have not been shy when it comes to socializing. I did travel quite a bit when I was with her but I kept the extra curricular activities to an absolute minimum since she was hot and gave me all the hot loving I wanted whenever I wanted. I never had to cheat on her because we had several break ups over the years and when we were apart, I would turn on the Red Light (a little Amsterdam humor for those who know).

I was about to jump in bed early one Saturday morning after being up all night working on some material for an associate website I contribute to. When I went to empty the bladder I felt a burning sensation coming from my dick that not only scared me, but made me yell out loud in pure agony it hurt so bad! I didn’t know what was going on, I was trying to look at Jack Jr. while I was peeing and of course I ended up pissing all over the place. I had drank several Cokes during my all nighter so I was pissing like a Race Horse and I thought hot razor blades were coming out! By the time I finally stopped I was almost in tears and I grabbed a hold of my tool and just held it as the pain seem to get even worse! I was almost too afraid to look at my dick but it was like a car accident on the side of the road, I was drawn to it. I had some swelling around the opening but no blood or puss was dripping out, but it still hurt like hell. I walked with my underwear around my ankles into my bedroom and just fell on the bed, still clutching my package, and just laid there curled up into a fetal position. I was whimpering like a little prison bitch but I didn’t care, I was scared and in pain!

When the pain finally subsided I got up and went back to the bathroom to look at my stuff in the mirror. The swelling was down and it looked normal again but I knew I had to get this looked at by some Professionals. I was also going through my mental spreadsheet of all the babes I had recently had sex with and I knew I hadn’t had unprotected sex in over a year since I was with the girlfriend. I then thought about the Colombian babe who gave me one hell of a good blow job in a Panamanian Massage Parlor without a rubber and also the hotel Maid I fucked in my room while in Lima Peru who did the same. Both of those incidents had been over a month old so I didn’t think those would be relevant, but those were the only babes I could think of that had sexual contact with Jack Jr. (oral not vaginal) in the last couple months.

I called a friend of mine who is a GYN Doctor in Chicago and told her about my situation, she was found it to be a little amusing but told me there was a chance I could’ve caught something, just what I needed to hear. She is the sister of a really close friend of mine so I felt I could share this embarrassing situation with her and I wasn’t even caring if she told anyone. She advised me to hit the Emergency Room but I remembered my Doctor’s office was open on Saturday’s so I got dressed and went right over to get checked out.

Luckily the office was empty so I knew there would be no wait. I stepped up to the desk and I see this really hot girl working there. I had never seen here before and I knew she had to notice me staring at her non stop. I introduced myself and told her I was there for a walk in to see Dr. S. When she asked what the problem was, I panicked when I couldn’t think of a pleasant way to say; “My dick is on fire and needs to be checked out!” I then thought to myself, “Would this not be a good time to ask her out?” I told her I was having a burning sensation when I urinated but assured her it couldn’t be an STD since I hadn’t had unprotected sex in over a year. She showed no emotion when she typed in my info and told me to have a seat. I did ask her was she new at this office, she told me she was and smiled at me. She gave me her name when I asked and continued to smile, offering no other conversation. I got the hint and sat my ass down like she told me to do earlier.

A few minutes later I was back in the exam room explaining to my Doctor why I missed my last appointment with her several months ago and also more importantly why I didn’t think I had an STD. She and the Nurse were both impressed (or disgusted) when she asked about my recent sexual encounters. When they asked for a urine sample I almost started to cry. I did have to go again but was trying not to. As I filled up the cup I did my best to muffle my moans of agony but I know someone heard me.  Dr. S. gave me a prescription for some antibiotics and told me to check back in a few days for the lab results and to come back in two weeks later. I was scheduled to make my first trip to the Middle East and Africa during that time so I knew I would most likely miss my appointment the Front Desk Cutie set me up with. I made one last attempt to be sociable with her but the flames from that shoot down were fiercer than the ones coming out of my dick, oh well maybe next time.

This story does have a happy ending (no pun intended), I got results back and I was negative for any type of STD, just had a urinary tract infection. After a couple days the pain from peeing did go away but not before me having to have a cool wet washcloth at the ready standby when I had to pee. I discovered that if I wrapped Jack Jr. in a cool wrap immediately after using the bathroom, it would cut the whimpering like a bitch time in half. I checked the office to see if the cute girl was in there and was prepared to show her my negative test results but have yet to see her.

I did learn my lesson though, if you are going to fornicate as much as I do in foreign countries, cover up that Tally Wacker like you are about to walk around the Artic Circle. I know that may not have been the cause of me getting an infection but after considerable research on urinary tract infections two of the leading causes are dirty asses and a lot of fucking. OK Wikipedia didn’t phrase it like that but you get my drift. I always make sure my apartment and ass region is clean since you never know when you may get lucky and get someone back to your place to give you some oral pleasures, so I’m cool in that department. Now I do tend to get my share of loving from the Honeys so I’m guessing one of those Professionals could’ve been a “Carrier” of something and passed it on to me, like the case when I contracted Scarlet Fever while in Japan, I don’t recall kissing on someone who was sick but someone sure as hell gave it to me. I’ll still have some fun on my travels but I will definitely be a little more selective of who gets to meet up with Jack Jr.

Jack Armstrong can be found contributing travel articles to his pages on Nsane Photography at;
www.nsanephotography.com

Look for Jack to appear on his own site in the new year, updates can be found on the Nsane Photography site.